The next time that you complain about all these lazy people on welfare, checking out with their SNAP card that your taxes pay for while they're on their iPhone and wearing their nice jeans, think of me and my beautiful daughter. No one from the outside would know our struggle. No one can see just by looking at me that I am a single mom that was just laid off, who has known better days financially. I'm texting on a hand-me-down iPhone that was a gift from my dad. Neither my daughter or myself look or smell like we're living below the poverty line, but we are. Everything we're wearing or holding was a gift from a birthday or Christmas, or a hand-me-down from a generous family. We both smile and laugh, neither of us looking dejected or homeless. But I'm paying for the cart of groceries that will feed us for the next week with government aid. Am I abusing the system? It doesn't feel like it to me.
How would I feed Paige if I didn't have food stamps? Her formula is expensive and I was unable to breast feed because of a medical condition. She needs fruits and vegetables and bread and meat to grow, and I need all of those things to have the energy to be a good mother to her. The charity of family and friends is wonderful and clearly comes from Holy Providence, but I still don't know anyone personally who is in the position to foot my monthly grocery bill or my rent. I was laid off the week before Christmas. I am the only income for my household and it's my job to do everything in my power to provide for my daughter. What would you do in my situation? Applying for food stamps definitely does a number on a person's pride - there's no need to perpetuate the stigma by publicly complaining about your tax dollars going to lazy welfare recipients who should just get a job.
I have applied for twenty plus jobs since the day I found out the hospital was shutting down. I have sold too-small baby clothes and other things that we didn't really need in order to have a little money to buy presents for Paige. Could I sell my slightly-broken iPhone and all the cute clothes I have before relying on government programs? Sure! But I'm sure I would get less than enough to buy a week's worth of groceries for all of it, and then I'd be stuck without a phone for potential employers to call me on, or clothes to wear to my interviews, or my sense of self-worth and pride in the way my daughter and I present ourselves to the world.
When I walked into the Jefferson County office to apply for more benefits than I was already receiving, I noticed that very few people in the room with me looked "poor." Many of them were wearing clothes that looked nice, had a smart phone, had kids next to them who were playing with fun, bright plastic toys that had seen very little wear. Would you judge everyone in that room? How do you know their story? Is there abuse in the system? Sure. Of course. Any system, no matter what it is or who is running it, even a church, will have a few people who want to take advantage of its generosity. But I am not one of those people. I am doing everything in my power to provide for Paige and I in this scary time of unemployment. And I'm sure everyone in that room had a story not too different from mine.
So next time you think of a food stamp recipient, think of me. Think of the judgements you may be passing on someone whose story you know nothing about. And remember that things are almost never what they seem. "Below the poverty line" may not look like the rambling homeless guy with no teeth. It may look like a nice girl with a beautiful daughter, lost in a world that dealt her a bad hand this time, doing everything she can to make her life better. "Below the poverty line" may look just like me.
