The End Is Coming

Wake up. Squint into that grey, 6.30 kind of light. Hit the snooze button once, twice, three times, but never fall back asleep. Chide yourself for this useless laziness. Propel yourself out of bed. The nausea will immediately hit you.

It's day you-lost-track of your misery, and you're in survival mode. Here we go.

Get in the shower. Deliriously squeeze way too much shampoo into your hand. Lather, rinse, don't repeat. Does anyone actually repeat? You don't have any time to do anything with your hair. Grab your shit, hold it together, power walk out the door to your car. Get in the car. Grip the steering wheel. Try to get a grip on that lump in your throat.

Walk into work. Smile and wave. You faker. You hypocrite. Sit at your desk. Don't look at the pictures that decorate your cubicle. Let the florescent light steal your sunshine and trap your little complaints in a box below the floorboards. Forget who you are. Stare at the cold blue screen.

Stare blankly into space on your smoke breaks, your lunch break. Don't think about it, whatever it is. Him, her, someone died, someone left, someone failed you. Or did you fail?

Forget your failures. Machines fail by way of design flaw.

Go home in a daze. Eat your supper in a daze. Watch TV in a daze. Read in a daze. Turn the lights out in a daze. Roll over and cry your little cry to the wall. Walls always listen.

Dream your dreams, your nightmares. Toss and turn. Sweat through the sheets. Your mind has run loose, broken its leash. You see it before you, his face, her face, their failures. Or are they your failures?

Hold tightly your failures. They will make sense, one day.

Wake up. Squint into that grey, 6.30 kind of light. Hit the snooze button once, twice, three times. Wonder when this will be over, when you will be uncrippled, unbroken, unchained.

Look in the mirror. Look yourself in the eyes. Somewhere in there is the strength to get you through this. Somewhere in there is the reason you keep getting out of bed.

Keep moving. The end is coming.